Sunday, January 23, 2011

Maple syrup and Milestones

Everything smells like maple syrup. Dang Fenugreek. I can't escape from it, its in my pours, its in Fiona's pours. The sweet smell is giving me a headache, on top of my body being spent from trying to keep up with Fiona's new found love of food. I have over 200 bags frozen but I am so afraid of falling behind. So if smelling like maple syrup keeps it coming, I guess I can deal for now.

I am so happy to be complaining about struggling to keep up with her! I feel like I can see her getting chunkier and chunkier every day. Since she has been doing so well sitting up in her Bumbo, and shes getting more then enough calories and a significant weight gain, I thought its finally time to start introducing rice cereal. I may have to call up our speech therapist, because its not going great. Shes not taking to the spoon too well. But it is only day two of trying, so I'll give her a little more time.

I use the same silver spoon that was mine as a baby. She is my princess, after all, so of course she would be fed with a silver spoon :). Not sure why my parents had one for me, we were far from royalty and definitely not flashy. Must have been a gift.

We are nearing 6 months and shes falling a little more behind. The surgery definitely threw us a couple steps backwards. Tummy time has been out of the question this whole month- she screams in pain on her tummy from her chest being sore still. I don't know how long it is going to take for her breast plate to heal. They sawed it open and stitched it back with metal wire to help the bone fuse back together. Tomorrow, she will start back up with therapy again though, and hopefully they will get the ball rolling. I've run out of games to try to play with her, she just seems she can't get comfortable.  She rolls to her side all the time, but no further. And she seems to bore quickly with toys.  Her head and body control is getting better when sitting with support, but sitting, lying or even being in our arms, she doesn't like to be in any position for very long.

I didn't keep track of the boys development because, well, it was never a concern. They were always ahead of kids their age for every milestone. I had two infants walking, no running around my house at just 9 months. But, my trigger-happy finger saved evidence of where they were at each month through the thousands of pictures I took. I made a SHUTTERFLY book of the twins first year (which I have yet to order, 2 years later, because the book is over a 100 pages and therefore pricey. Charlie- maybe a mothers day gift?)

Looking back on pictures of Gavin and Breiden when they were five months, they could sit on their own, roll around the room and rest on their elbows while on their tummy to play with toys. I know that I can't expect Fiona to do things in the same time line and that its normal for her to be where she is.  I'll do as you do, just at my own pace. But I am struggling more then I thought with her being in the newborn stage for so long. I don't enjoy this stage compared to most. With my whole heart, I love cuddling with babies. But I long to play with Fiona like I do with my boys. My heart is filled when I can get her laughing and interacting with me- but its far and few between. I want to roll a ball back and forth with her and watch her clap with joy at her accomplishment. I want to chase her around the house, her telling me " you can't get me, mommy!" The greatest joy as a parent is watching your kids grow. And she is, just really slowly in every shape and form. I try to tell myself to savor this, because someday, when I have three bratty teenagers that want nothing to do with me, I'll crave these days. Days where the only thing that made them happy was to be in my arms and where they would let me just stare at their sweet faces for hours. The feel of their soft, chubby skin, the sweet baby giggles and the never ending adorable faces that will someday probably be replaced with rolling eyes. But I have to say, the first few months are very boring to me. My boys are ten times more work, but (sorry Fiona) they are ten times more fun.

As I write this, my little peanut woke up and so I stopped to be with her. And its as if she knew that I was saying that I wanted to play because she was all about some Peek-A-Boo, laughing hysterically every time I pulled the blankie back." See mommy, I can be fun, too." I needed that to snap back. Fiona is my little reminder to slow down, take my time and enjoy the journey. I am excited for the day all three of my kids are using me as a jungle gym, but I'll have to be patient with Fiona's pace.

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