Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Thoughts and Prayers

There is this constant blog dialogue running through my mind at all times.

It's like my mind is writing a journal entry about everything I see.

At times this voice that is typing away in my thoughts can be annoying and loud. But viewing my life through narration rather then just an observation makes me take detailed note of otherwise unremarkable things. I live- eat- breath every movement my babies are making, engraving my husbands adoring smiling into the deepest part of my memory and seeing past the mundane into the spectacular. My camera has become my third eye, helping me remember the moments that otherwise would quickly be forgotten. And this ongoing book I am writing in my head slowly materializes here on this blog, giving both myself and my family a memoir to keep us grounded in the little and big things in life that are precious and beautiful. I didn't realize I had so much to write about, not that any or all of it is interesting to anyone but me, but for every one entry I type, a hundred more are stored in my head.

I love every ounce of boyishness that are my boys. The vrooms and cho cho's that fill my house as they play with their cars and trains. The sound of play power tools that buzz fake bolts and screws into place. The whizzing of super hero caps darting past me, one arm in the air with shouts of "To the rescue!" and "super here-e-o!" The grown up talk and responses are my favorite. Hearing them answer with, "No, thank you." "Okay" or when they react to something with "Huh?", there is no way to give justice to how flippin adorable that all sounds coming from my little men. Not to mention the joy of just sitting back and eavesdropping on their conversations. Breiden has started calling Gavin, Gav, and I love that he gave him his own nickname. They help each other, they think of each other, they love playing together.

We are potty trained, but still using diapers for naps and night time. This was before bed.

I watched Fiona playing with her toys by herself, as she often does, while her brothers ran and played together. Watching her, I was struck with a sadness for her that she was all by her self. The boys never were. They never ever had to play alone. I don't know why this hit me the way that it did, but as much as I have always said how lucky the twins are to have each other, this was the first time I really understood how amazing it must be to be a twin. And little Fiona, unable to move, just sits longingly watching her brothers, sighing occasionally, waiting for them to come play with her. Gavin and Breiden aren't going to be able to escape from her once she can get around. She is going to be glued to their side, I can just tell. Who can blame her, the boys  are wild and crazy and if I were her I wouldn't want to miss one second of fun with them either.

My Dad is donating his kidney tomorrow to a fellow coach and friend of his. After lots of testing and evaluations and rescheduling, its finally happening. Months ago, he had to go through a psych evaluation to make sure he was mentally stable, and what not, to do this. The therapist was intrigued that he would be doing this, especially since it wasn't for an immediate family member. I guess its quiet rare for someone to give up an organ for any one other then family. She asked him, "Why are you willing to go through all of this?" with out hesitation my Dad replied " Because I don't want my friend to die" I love my Dad and am proud that he is doing this for his friend. Please keep both him and his friend Bill in your prayers tomorrow as they remove my dads kidney and give it to Bill. Especially for Bill, as this surgery is much more risky for him.


  1. Will keep your Dad and Bill in my prayers. Keep us posted

    Miss Fiona is getting so big and I love the pictures of your sweet boys! Such cute kiddos.

  2. I have those times…running narrations. Most of them get lost though since I am too far from the keyboard.
    Adorable pictures!


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