Wednesday, July 20, 2011

The GQ article

My hands are shaking and my ears are burning. This is the first real attack on my daughter that has hurt besides all the insensitive people who recommended aborting her. I know I am probably the 100th person to blog about this, seeing as I don't really read magazines or watch the news, so I am probably days or even weeks late in finding this out. But I have never wanted to lash out on someone so badly before in my life. I am thankful I do not know this man and have no way to contact him right this moment because I don't think I would be able to have any self control.

John B. Thompson wrote an article for GQ, oh- just July 15th so I am not too far behind, referencing Boston's style as "... Down syndrome style, where a little extra ruins everything."

It wasn't the Down syndrome style that really got to me- that was kind of like hearing the R word, it stings but I can get past it.  But the knife went through my heart with "extra ruins everything". As in my daughters extra 21st chromosome ruined her- she's trash, worthless.

Ha ha, Mr Thompson. I can just see the men reading your article smile, maybe even chuckle, at your heartless metaphor. And that just hurts even more. You are making my daughter, my life, a joke. You are pulling the stereotype card, making judgements without knowing, and possibly evening thinking the insensitive thought that you can make fun of these people because they are too stupid to know. But they are not. And neither are the people who love them. I am sure there were thousands of other metaphors out there that did not take a stab directly into my heart. You have no idea how much our families have to go through and how much our kids endure and how much they accomplish. Brain Skotko ( who did the radio interview with me for World Down Syndrome Day) says it best here .

I see the insensitivity- cruelness- everywhere. And each time is hurts a little more. I have been trying to not let it bother me, to be okay that people don't mean what they say- after all, I once spoke ignorantly and I would never say I ever hated or was cruel to those with special needs, I have heard my family and close friends freely use the word- but whether anyone means what they are saying or trying to be the cool person and get a laugh, the R word directly refers to people like my daughter. And her extra chromosome makes life a little more complicated, yes, but no less worthy, no less deserving of respect and love, not a destroyer of her life.


  1. Isn't it ridiculous. My last post was the email I wrote them and the copy and pasted reply I got back. I suppose I should be glad that they at least did that? But I think we all deserve a very public apology and a whole magazine dedicated to the education and advocation of those with Down syndrome!


  2. This hurt me too. I cant bare the thought of Russell being the butt of ANY joke!! And its not being OVER sensitive as some may think, its just plain being sensitive to ignorant things said about our children! I just find it hard to believe that in this day and age any adult would think that was funny...disgusting!!

  3. Your daughter is beautiful! That's all I see! There will always be ignorant people in this world. You know that you're blessed with your wisdom and love for your daughter.


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